is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
This baby is an asshole
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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