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• (612): View more from Minnesota

  I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.

  Fav 23 3593 1807

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• (517): View more from Michigan

  Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.

  Fav 25 4615 1881

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.

  Fav 12 4415 1326

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• (315): View more from New York

  I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.

  Fav 9 4811 2149

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  23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (904): View more from Florida

  Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?

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• (415): View more from California

  I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.

  Fav 2 1132 697

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• (410): View more from Maryland

  Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  all 3? possibly?

  (410): View more from Maryland

  I think I'm up to the challenge.

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• (541): View more from Oregon

  Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.

  Fav 4 840 1076

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• (248): View more from Michigan

  I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life

  Fav 2 816 664

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• 

  The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (330): View more from Ohio

  I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.

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• (703): View more from Virginia

  I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.

  Fav 3 331 153

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• (612): View more from Minnesota

  He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.

  Fav 1 124 251

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• (585): View more from New York

  You were more fun when you didn't have morals.

  Fav 1 193 78

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• (903): View more from Texas

  Really need a jack off emoji

  (903): View more from Texas

  Who do we write to about that?

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