I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
Congratulations! We have a period
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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