turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
