Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
