I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
Randomize
