I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
