New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Randomize
