Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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