so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
i think i have two assholes
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Randomize
