just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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