Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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