I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Randomize