I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
