So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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