so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
my sisters under your porch take her home
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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