organizing the empties. That sober.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize