All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
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