i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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