so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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