so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Randomize
