It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Michael Bay diarrhea
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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