I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
Randomize
