can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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