thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
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