Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
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