I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
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