Me. At least after what I've been through.
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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