The maid of honor just puked.
So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Randomize