she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
I think people are normalizing furries
Randomize
