I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
