Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
