I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize
