I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
I'm eating all of the evidence.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
