so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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