This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
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She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
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But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
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