ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
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