whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
Randomize
