Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Randomize
