I feel great
I just peed on a car
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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