It's like a parade of train wrecks.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize