i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i drank out of a bidet.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Drake has all the answers
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
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