I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Randomize
