I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
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