this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
i just had sex bonerless
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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