He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
