He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
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