The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
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