I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Randomize
