bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
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